Well, my bags are packed and I am soon to depart for Cochabamba, Bolivia tomorrow! I am excited to begin this new chapter of learning and adventure, yet I know from experience that it will not all be fun and games. There will be hard times and difficult moments along the way because that is just how life goes. What comfort there is in knowing that God works all things together for good to those who love Him and that I can rest in His purposes!
I will be sharing some specific prayer requests for my journey in the next post. Meanwhile, since it may be a few days before I have the chance to give an update from Bolivia, I thought I would post an article that I recently wrote in hopes that it will be a blessing and encouragement. I will warn you it is long! But you have several days to read through it, if you like, since it will be a little while before I am back on Blogger. :)
My thoughts are not necessarily new or earth-shattering; in fact many of you have probably already come to similar conclusions. This article was mainly an attempt to document a journey of thinking God took me through this past year. It is more like a personal journal entry written for the purpose of organizing my thoughts and Bible study findings. I hope that if nothing else, it will stir you to study God's Word for yourself on the topic and "press toward the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."
Discourse On The Word “Calling”
While I was at school this past year, I was challenged inwardly be a statement I heard on more than one occasion: “Make sure you marry someone who has the same calling in life as you do.”
At first, when I heard that counsel, it made sense to me and I agreed with it. But the more I pondered it in my heart, the more questions and doubts I had.
“What is my calling?
“I’ve said for many years, I am called to be a missionary. Does this mean I should marry a missionary? I’ve often said I will only marry a missionary or someone involved in full-time ministry. But what exactly is the definition of a missionary? What is full-time ministry? Is it really my job as the woman to have as a pre-requisite that the man who marries me shares my calling? The woman is supposed to be the follower; not the leader! So, doesn’t it make more sense to follow his calling? But what if his calling isn’t in missions? Do I give it up for the sake of being his wife? Or what if he starts out in full time ministry and then changes gears and works a secular job? Of course, if I was his wife, I would follow him wherever; even if it meant leaving a foreign field and living in America again. So if this is my attitude in the middle of marriage, shouldn’t this be my attitude before even entering a marriage? That it doesn’t matter so much what he does as who he is?”
Around and around these thoughts swirled.
When I was in the beginning stages of a courtship with a young man at the beginning of the school year, a trusted friend challenged me with the question, “Are you attracted to this guy because of his vocational choice of being a pastor in South America? What if one day he says, ‘God has told me to stop being a pastor and to open a tortilla factory.’ Then what? If you could see the future and knew this would eventually happen, does it change your feelings for him now? In other words, are you attracted to this guy because of his connection to the Latino culture and his desire to be in ministry or because of who he is as a person? Are you ready to be this guy’s helpmeet no strings attached?”
Well, as it turned out, we called the courtship off due to the discovery of several major, irreconcilable differences we had. However, I continued to ponder the counsel of my friend in future months.
I remember my brother-in-law, Nathan, asking a similar question to my sister during their courtship. “If there would ever come a time when God would move us out of ministry in Ukraine and back to the United States, how would you feel about that?” My sister wisely stated, “When I marry you, I will go where you go. I am excited about ministering in Ukraine, but my first ministry will always be to my family...no matter where God takes us.”
Of course, I agree with that statement! So again, I asked myself, “If that would be my same response to a hypothetical situation after getting married, could I have that same attitude before getting married? That it doesn’t matter what this man is doing for a living or where he is located, because vocations and locations could change. It matters who this person is; his relationship with the Lord, his character...because once I marry him, he becomes my main ministry.” It made sense.
Nevertheless, I couldn’t escape the fact that despite these revelations, I still found a person who wanted to be in “full-time ministry” more attractive than a person who was going to be a plumber or an accountant.
I brought this topic up for discussion with a married couple on campus who had become close friends and mentors for me...just to get their perspective on the issue. The first question out of the man’s mouth was, “Well, what is ministry?” Bingo! Exactly! That was the same question I had been wrestling with. They encouraged me, when considering a fellow as a potential spouse, to really examine his life. A person living in “full-time ministry” is one who has a heart to serve the Lord wherever he finds himself in life, one who will be faithful to share Christ with the people around him, whether he works an office job or preaches from a pulpit in a church several times a week.
A missionary is not only someone who receives his paycheck from a mission board or supporting churches; nowadays, there are many “missionaries” who earn their own “support” working in foreign countries on business visas. They are called “vocational missionaries” and do this either because the country is closed to blatant Gospel work and the only way to get in is under a secular job title, or because they’re not necessarily cut out to be preachers or church planters, but they still want to use their occupational specialty to further the kingdom of God (i.e. graphic design, communications, construction, etc.). So are vocational missionaries not real missionaries because they work a regular job and do ministry on the side? Of course not! We know the story of Priscilla and Aquilla in the New Testament who were tent-makers as well as ministers of the Gospel and helpers to Paul.
So that then raises the question, what about people in America who work regular jobs, but who share Christ at the office, who preach on the streets, or who participate in children’s ministry at their church on a regular basis? Does this “count” as full-time ministry? What about those, like I’m acquainted with, who work at Care Net Pregnancy Center, or Compassion International, or the Rio Grande Bible Institute? Whether their salaries come from the ministry itself or from supporting churches, are some considered more “true-blue” missionaries than others?
Around our strawberry shortcake that night, my friends helped me to understand that ministry is a way of life; not a place, not a job title, not the activities that fill one’s day. So, it’s not wrong to be attracted to a fellow who is involved in ministry, because this shows his heart for the Lord and kingdom work! It is important, however, to hold the right definition of ministry and not narrow it down simply to a vocation: traditional missionaries on the foreign field, evangelists, and pastors. Because, as we said before, vocations could change.
In considering a young man as a potential spouse, I need to look at his life. If he works a regular job, is his interest only in making money and living “The American Dream?” Obviously, such a focus is completely opposite from a lifestyle of ministry. If, on the other hand, his job is simply his launching place to sharing about Christ with others, his way of making money to provide for his family and to support kingdom work around the world, that is a ministry lifestyle. Of course, his convictions on family life need to be taken into consideration as well if I truly want someone whose first ministry will be his family. Which I do. Very much.
As the semester continued, puzzle pieces started falling into place about this whole topic of one’s “calling.”
As I continued pondering these things in my heart, it occurred to me that the very first work God gave the very first man to do was “secular”...if you want to call it that. He told Adam to tend the garden and name the animals as part of the dominion mandate. Now, obviously, this was before other people lived on earth and therefore there was no need for “ministry” to bring others to know the Father. Nevertheless, it struck me that Adam’s obedience to this vocational work God had given him to do brought God great pleasure. And isn’t that what the purpose of life boils down to anyway? Glorifying God?
So is God more glorified by a person who works a job as a chemical engineer in Massachusetts or one who directs an orphanage in Africa? Good question. I would propose that the vocation itself doesn’t necessarily bring God pleasure; it’s the person and his attitude, and his motive that determines whether or not God is glorified. Granted, there are specific commands in Scripture we are given to obey and the Bible does exhort us to invest in works that are equated with gold, silver, and precious stones rather than wood, hay, and stubble. But my point is that God is not necessarily impressed with one vocation over another. He is looking for men whose hearts are perfect toward Him, who love Him and follow Him and proclaim Him no matter what job they work.
So if God is not impressed with one vocation over another, why am I? I guess because in the circles I have been discipled in, the vocation of pastor or missionary has been promoted so much, I tend to think of these jobs as being the highest and best for a Christian. True, those who pursue such paths tend to have the same desire to live in the light of eternity as I do, and this also influences my attraction toward those who have chosen this vocational pursuit. However, there are many, many Godly people who are not working as a pastor or missionary and still living in the light of eternity! How important that I don’t put the kind of husband I want into a vocational box!
The last missionary club meeting of the semester seemed to solidify many of these swirling thoughts into a concrete understanding. The topic was on one’s calling. Coincidence? I think not. I don’t remember a whole lot of what the speaker shared but this one statement claimed my attention: “Our calling in life is this: to have a relationship with God through Jesus Christ and to bring Him glory.”
That sure simplifies things! It makes so much sense! Why was I getting all caught up in the idea of a calling being primarily vocational? My calling is to have a relationship with God through Jesus Christ and to bring Him glory. Anything else I do with my life is extra, and should be founded on this calling.
Sometimes, God has to take us back to the clear-cut basics to slice through the fog of all the extras.
The speaker pointed out that on various occasions throughout Scripture, God did call certain people to specific tasks. Noah. Abraham. Moses. Paul.
So, can a calling involve a certain vocation or specific task? Yes. Nevertheless, we must keep in mind that our foundational calling is that of having a relationship with the Lord.
The more I thought about the time in my life that I’ve looked back on as when God “called” me into missions, the more I realized that I have, in recent years, changed the description of what happened that day to a calling rather than the simple question that it was. I distinctly remember the setting. I was in my room having my quiet time. It was around the time I was in a drama at church about the life of Jim Elliot, Nate Saint, and the other missionaries who were martyred in Ecuador several decades ago. There were lines in the script that really gripped my attention about people dying without Christ. Then, as I was reading in my Bible that unforgettable morning, I read these words: “If thou faint in the day of adversity, thy strength is small. If thou forbear to deliver them that are drawn unto death, and those that are ready to be slain; if thou sayest, Behold, we knew it not; doth not he that pondereth the heart consider it? and he that keepeth thy soul, doth not he know it? and shall not he render to every man according to his works?”
In that moment, the Spirit of God very clearly spoke to my heart and asked me if I would be willing to give up the comforts of life here and go to another country, if He wanted me to, to rescue those who were being drawn unto death...not just physically, but spiritually. I spent a long time in prayer and thought as I counted the cost before answering Him, but I clearly remember saying, “Yes, Lord. Behold the handmaid of the Lord. Be it unto me according to Thy Word.”
Did He call me to missions in that moment? I used to think so, but now I have to say, “No. He asked me if I was willing to go if He wanted to use me in that way. It was a test of my surrender.” Several years later, when missions had become so important to me and I couldn’t bear to imagine my life spent in any other way, He asked me the reverse question. “Would you be willing to let go of your desire to go to another country and be just as content to proclaim Me here in America?” This time, it was even harder to surrender because I desperately wanted to hang on to my dreams. But I saw that even dreams of serving the Lord in a certain way can become idols. So that night, I laid my desires back on the altar and told Him I was willing to stay here if that was His will.
My point in sharing this story is to clarify that for me, God did not call me into missions. He asked me if I was willing to go. I do believe He has clearly led me to pursue ministry both here and in other countries, but as I will point out later, I think there can be a difference between being led and being called.
Upon my arrival home after a busy semester, with plenty of time on my hands for Bible study, I decided to dive into a study of this word, “calling” (and its derivatives) to really get an understanding of Scripture on this topic.
My discoveries have been nothing short of fascinating!
First of all, I looked up every reference to the terms “calling,” or “called” in the New Testament. Then, based on these verses, I compiled the following lists:
What is our calling as Christians?
(the order as read in the New Testament)
- Called to be saints, “the called of Jesus Christ”
- Called according to His purpose (first foreknown, then predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, then called, then justified, then glorified)
- Called unto the fellowship of Jesus Christ
- Called into the grace of Christ
- Called unto liberty
- Called in one hope of our calling
- Called in one body
- Called unto His kingdom and glory
- Called unto holiness
- Called to glorify the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ in us according to His grace
- Called by the Gospel
- Called to eternal life
- Called and saved with a holy calling according to His own purpose and grace which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began
- Called of a heavenly calling
- Called out of darkness into His marvelous light
- Called to follow His steps who did no sin (even in the face of suffering)
- Called unto His eternal glory by Christ Jesus
- Called to glory and virtue
- Called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb
Categorized by preposition:
- Called out of darkness into His marvelous light
- Called of a heavenly calling
- Called of Jesus Christ
- Called by the Gospel
- Called in one hope
- Called in one body
- Called according to His purpose (first foreknown, then predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, then called, then justified, then glorified)
- Called and saved with a holy calling according to His own purpose and grace which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began
- Called to be saints
- Called to glorify the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ in us according to His grace
- Called to follow His steps who did no sin (even in the face of suffering)
- Called to glory and virtue
- Called to eternal life
- Called into the grace of Christ
- Called unto the fellowship of Jesus Christ
- Called unto liberty
- Called unto His kingdom and glory
- Called unto holiness
- Called unto His eternal glory by Christ Jesus
- Called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb
It is very interesting to me to note that based on the majority of verses in the New Testament, the Biblical usage of this term “calling” is quite different than how we commonly use it today (i.e. specific vocation/ministry/task). From these verses, we see that the term is always and only used to refer to believers; who we are called to be in Christ, how He calls us to live, what we are called to do (in a general sense), and where we are called to go when we leave this planet. It is noteworthy to mention that these callings are always by God, for God, to God, and through God.
Now, is it wrong to use the term “calling” to refer to a specific task or position? No. There is certainly Scriptural reference of this definition as well.
New Testament references to a specific calling:
- Barnabas and Saul were separated for a specific work the Holy Ghost called them unto. (Acts 13:2-3)
- Through a vision, the Lord called for Paul and Barnabas to preach unto the people of Macedonia. (Acts 16:9-11)
- Paul noted that he was called to be an apostle, and later stated, “He hath saved us and called us with an holy calling...according to His own purpose and grace...whereunto I am appointed a preacher, and an apostle, and a teacher of the Gentiles.” (Romans 1:1-7, 1 Cor. 1:1-3)
- Aaron was called of God to be the first high priest. (Hebrews 5:1-5)
- Abraham was called to go out into a place which he should after receive for an inheritance. (Hebrews 11:8)
As I thought about other people who were specifically called by God for a specific task here is the list I came up with:
- Noah
- Moses
- Joshua
- Samuel
- Isaiah
- Jeremiah
- Ezekial
- Jonah
- Mary of Nazareth
- The 12 apostles
There were probably others that I’m just not remembering, but it is interesting to note that the people called in Scripture by the Lord for a specific task were relatively few in number. However, we see in the New Testament that all of us believers are called to be saints, to be in fellowship with the Lord Jesus Christ, to walk in holiness and liberty, to fulfill God’s purposes for us, to glorify the Name of Jesus Christ in us. I believer that inherit within this calling, therefore, is the call to obey the Lord’s commands which include loving God wholeheartedly, making disciples of all nations, being witnesses unto Him, preaching the Gospel to every creature, doing good works, visiting the fatherless and widow, raising children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and so much more. Granted, some men are specifically given the instruction by God to be pastors or evangelists in a vocational sense (Ephesians 4:11), but I believe that all Christians should be involved in ministry and obedience to the Great Commission no matter where they live and no matter what they do to earn a paycheck. Our “calling” is the same; to glorify the Name of Christ and engage in Kingdom work.
Here are some other thoughts I scribbled down in my study of this topic:
There is a difference between our calling as Christians and our spiritual gift/measure of grace given. One is general and one is specific.
There is a difference between having a desire for being or doing something and having a calling to that same thing. Let’s not get the two confused and say that God called me to a particular work simply because I have the desire to go and do it. Nothing wrong with such a desire; the Bible makes it clear that when you “delight yourself in the Lord, He will give you the desires of your heart.”
I propose that to have a calling to a particular work means that God specifically spoke to you. In the Bible, He always did it vocally, whether through a dream, a Damascus road experience, a burning bush, etc. However, now we have the Word of God as our guide. I therefore believe that it is possible to receive a specific calling of God through His Word speaking to one’s heart, as a result of a sermon heard, or through a distinct impression that He is speaking to your Spirit.
Sometimes, God’s calling to a particular place or work will be temporary. Such was the case with Paul and Barnabas being called to preach to the people in Macedonia. They did not devote the rest of their lives to that place. They simply followed God’s calling there and then when the work was finished, they moved on to the next location as God led.
Sometimes, God will lead and give direction but I don’t know that it is right to use the word calling in such a context. Nevertheless, there would seem to be overlap in the two ideas.
Now, what about women? I’ve often heard it said that a woman’s highest calling is to be a wife and mother. I am not arguing with the intended meaning behind this statement; that being a wife and mother is a noble and honorable position and one to be embraced with wholehearted enthusiasm. However, if a woman remains unmarried and yet “cares for the things of the Lord” all during this time, does that mean she is living a “lower” calling? Women like Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Gladys Aylward, and Corrie ten Boom come to mind. I agree that women were created to be the helpmeet of the man and that this is the normative pattern God has established for women. Nevertheless, there are those who never do for a host of various reasons. Was their life a waste? A mere shadow of what it could have been if they had married? Did they miss their high calling?
What about women, whether young or old, will eventually get married, but for right now, they are in the season of being unmarried? During this season, are they living according to a “low calling” while they bide their time waiting for God’s choice in a husband so they can live the “high calling” of being a wife and mother?
Do you see how this word can get us in trouble? If we stick to the Bible’s use of the word “calling” we will see that all Christians, men or women, young or old, married or unmarried, share the same calling from God. Forgive me if I seem repetitive, but it bears repeating! We are all called out of darkness into His marvelous light, called by the Gospel, called to the fellowship of Jesus Christ, called to His Kingdom and glory, called unto liberty, called unto holiness, called to glorify the Name of Christ in our very beings, called to eternal life. It doesn’t get any higher than that.
So back to women specifically. “The unmarried woman cares for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit.” (1 Corinthians 7:34) It’s a statement of fact that communicates the Lord’s will for an unmarried woman. Therefore, the unmarried woman who is living according to this verse is living according to the specific purpose God has laid forth for her and is bringing Him glory! That is what it’s all about, right?
The married woman, on the other hand, “cares for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.” We know from other passages that God’s will for married women is to bear children, guide the house, love their husbands, love their children, be keepers at home, and obedient to their own husbands that the Word of God be not blasphemed and that the adversary have none occasion to speak reproachfully. This is God’s stated purpose for married women; that’s not to say they don’t “care for the things of the Lord” as an unmarried woman, but simply that the way they care for the things of the Lord is different, with a focus on husband and children that an unmarried woman simply doesn’t have.
Conclusion
So, back to the original question that started this whole journey. Should I marry a man that has the same calling in life as myself? That would depend on how the word calling is defined.
YES, I should marry a man who is called by the Gospel of God to be a saint, called to the fellowship of Jesus Christ, called to glory and virtue, called to holiness and liberty, called to His kingdom, called to glorify the Name of Christ.
Does he have to be a missionary going to South America to work with orphans?
NO. This is the vocational work God has led me to pursue for this next season of life as an unmarried woman, but it is not a pre-requisite that my future husband must share this same pursuit. If God allows me to marry one day, my role will be to serve as the helpmeet of my husband; to go where he goes, to support and enable him to be all he can be in whatever vocation he chooses or is called to and in his role as leader of the family. While I will still seek to make disciples in obedience to the Great Commission, my first and most important disciples will be my children. And Lord willing, our family will strive together to view ministry as a life-style.
“Wherefore the rather, brethren, give diligence to make your calling and election sure: for if ye do these things, ye shall never fall: For so an entrance shall be ministered unto you abundantly into the everlasting kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.” 2 Peter 1:10-11
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Addendum
It was interesting to me that after I had come to these conclusions through the Holy Spirit’s working and was preparing to write this article, I re-read that email my friend, Joshua Steele, had sent me about the possibility of a tortilla-making husband. :) For some reason, I hadn’t remembered all his other words of wisdom, but now they confirmed my own thoughts and beliefs:
Calling. Here we come to the second of my concerns. I'll start with a quick story. When Kelsie and I were still courting, everyone knew we were headed back to Ukraine. A woman in our church came up to me one day and asked if I was sure I should go back to Ukraine. When I said yes, she asked, "But what if Kelsie doesn't feel called there?" That question is illustrative of a major flaw in her understanding of God's calling in the lives of believers. These days, it's common to hear someone extol a couple because "they're both called to X." But here's the point: in Scripture, God does not call married woman to a ministry. God calls men to a ministry, and He calls married women to their husbands. I know of a lot of young ladies who are searching for a man whose calling matches their own. This is a dangerous and unbiblical search. Certainly God may call a single woman to serve Him in a certain way prior to marriage. But marriage itself is a calling, and the woman's role in that calling is to be a helper to her husband. Many woman foolishly enter into marriage because of what their husband is doing at that time, and then cry foul later on when he changes his occupation.
I've been in ministry for many years and in that time I've seen a lot of people quit. Money is often a big player, especially for foreigners. It's quite plausible that “José” may be forced to seek secular employment in order to make ends meet. In time, he may leave full time ministry all together. I'm not saying this is likely, but it's possible. The real question is how such changes would affect your decision if you could know about them ahead of time. The day you marry “José” is the day you give up your calling to Latino missions and begin your calling to help “José” in whatever he does.
Amen, brother! Couldn’t have said it better myself. :)
Again, the Lord brought further confirmation of these convictions when I re-read the answer to a letter in a No Greater Joy magazine from years ago that rang true with what I had just written here:
Dear Mr. Pearl, I am a young man of 16 years. I really want to preach the Gospel. So I am trying to plan and prepare myself to. I am a certified farrier, a certified horse trainer, and a classical guitarist. Where could I be best used in the mission field? What do I need to do to prepare myself? What language or languages do I need to learn? Would I have to provide my own support? Do you or any of your associates offer training? You know more about what I need to do to prepare myself, so please tell me even if I don’t ask. I really love the unadulterated word of God, and support all your material and will use it if possible. I hold no allegiance to any man-made doctrine and will let the Bible be my truth. Sincerely, Benjamin H. Munson
Dear Benjamin, Stop thinking of ministry as a vocation; start thinking of it as a lifestyle. Continue to pursue your talents and abilities in farriering, horse training and guitar to pre- pare to make a living and be self-supporting. Never expect someone to support you in ministry.
Study the Bible; teach it to someone as you study, say, one to four people. When I was seventeen I taught at a rescue mission and witnessed to people on the street, teaching the Bible to anyone who would listen.
Ministry happens in the course of life, if you have the heart to minister. If you have a life that truly ministers, people will seek you out. Ministry may take full time, but if you have the ability to support yourself you will always be free from the controls of religion.
I say again: study the Bible and teach it as you study. There is not a Bible college or training that can make you a minister.
Respectfully,
Michael Pearl
night, I was asked to give a presentation to the children of the Patch the Pirate Club at our church about my upcoming missionary venture to Bolivia. I started out by showing them a map of the world so they could see where Bolivia was located in comparison to Texas. "Whoa! That's far!" came their exclamations of awe at the thought of such a long distance and plane ride. They loved the feel of the word "Cochabamba" on their tongue and practiced saying it several times.
The Bible tells us we should have faith like a child. You see, we adults sometimes don't have very strong faith. We don't always think God can do this or that. But of course He can! He is very powerful and can do anything! You children know this. You believe God is powerful! You believe that when you pray God hears you. And so, I ask you to please pray for me in Bolivia." I went on to share a few specific requests with them and then I gave each one a prayer card to keep in their Bibles.
